fear and the cowardly lion
June 18th, 2007People living deeply have no fear of death. —Anais Nin
Why is that?
Well, I think that one of the things that has kept me from really, REALLY succeeding in life is that I have been afraid to just “go for it”… to just dive into the water, so to speak.
It all goes back to when I was a toddler, and my parents took me to swimming lessons when we lived in Coronado. I remember not wanting to participate and didn’t want to let go of the edge of the pool. I remember clinging on and not wanting to go toward the swim instructor.
Of course, now I can swim laps in an Olympic-sized pool, but my fear of swimming in the ocean is still there, even though I can swim in the ocean.
And this feeling about not wanting to take chances (and just jump on in) had carried on into my adulthood.
Fear plays a very important part in our daily life, and in human society as a whole. Fear comes in many shapes and forms, but it could be described as: an unpleasant feeling of perceived risk or danger, real or not. It functions to make us alert and ready for action while expecting specific problems.
Nowadays, especially when it comes to drumming, I will take chances and just go for it. Music in general has been this amazing security blanket in my life. Playing drums and piano was something I sort of sought refuge in, like the Buddhist monk seeking refuge in the Buddha.
But as good of a musician as I had become, I lacked a lot of confidence in other things in my life. And thus becoming afraid of going beyond my comfort zone in music.
At least I admit that I have fears. That’s a start, and from there one can make efforts in overcoming them. A lot of the hurdles are psychological, some purely phyiscal. Because I’m a drummer, I’m afraid to go skiing or do anything that might hurt my knees and thus, keep me from playing drums. But I think that is a legitimate fear, because if I can’t play drums then I can’t earn money… a living.
Maybe there’s this point I will not go beyond, to take chances, even in my musical career. I once was invited to do a 3-5 month gig in Bangkok, Thailand. But I was afraid of going. I think it has been a fear of taking advantage of opportunities that have created obstacles in my life, even in my music career. Maybe part of that is my family, that I might lose them if I am away for too long. Or fear of the unknown, that if I go there I might somehow get involved with the wrong people, forced to become slave labor, or forced to become a heroine addict.
Yes, I have a pretty active imagination, so that doesn’t quite help me in overcoming my fears.
The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature. —Anne Frank
Recently, I’ve been more afraid of getting out there on the streets and highways, because of a couple of weeks ago when someone hit me from behind on the freeway. And it was a hit-and-run… the guy sped off leaving me by myself by the side of the road.
But the Cowardly Lion was somehow able to conquer his fears. And a lot of the ability to conquer those fears lies in having the right attitude, and training the mind look at things differently as to not be afraid. It’s easier said than done, yes. But it can be done.
On the other hand, fear is a necessary emotion to alert us of potential dangers. It is a necessary emotion that allows us to take the necessary actions in order to survive. So, it is an important emotion that allows us to be cautious, and to stay away from danger.
So, should I embrace my fears and acknowledge them as necessary thing to avoid danger and to help one survive?
[ this entry is part of the June 2007 collaborations project ]
