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A Special Tribute to My Father-in-Law

father-in-law

A Special Tribute to My Father-in-Law

Father

Today, I pay special tribute to my father-in-law, who passed away on June 3rd, 2008. He was diagnosed in January 2008 with Pancreatic Cancer. Today’s his birthday and he would’ve been 87.

Going through my collection of photos from last year, I came upon a photo taken at a Dim Sum restaurant, with the family celebrating my father-in-law’s 86th birthday. He is surrounded by his grandchildren…

My father-in-law was a Mechanical Engineer who graduated from the Mapua Institute of Technology in The Philippines, and worked abroad in many countries: including Saudi Arabia, South Korea, Vietnam and the U.S. He retired early at age 50. Became a widower when my Mother-in-law died of breast cancer in 1989.

He spent many good years devoted to his family and early on taught the value of a college education to his beloved grandchildren…

[Above Photo, Left to Right] – Diana, Amanda, Cameron, Lolo Clem, Jordan, Alyssa, and Alex.

His Grandchildren

  • Diana (25) – who just celebrated HER birthday yesterday, graduated from UC Berkeley with a degree in Architecture, and currently works as an Architect in Costa Rica and San Francisco. She plans on doing graduate studies soon.
  • Amanda (20) – is currently in her 3rd year at Harvard studying Government and plans to study Law. We’ll be attending her graduation next year in 2010. And it just seemed like only yesterday when I attended her high school graduation!
  • Cameron (20) – my oldest son, who is currently studying Biological Sciences at UC Riverside, wants to become a Doctor of Oncology and help in the fight against cancer.
  • Jordan (16) – my youngest son, who is a Junior in high school right now, talks about studying engineering in college. He is passionately devoted to the Jr. ROTC, Bboy dancing, Xbox and Playstation.
  • Alyssa – (7) – currently a 2nd grader, says she wants to become a doctor but at her age… too early to tell. She might become an astronaut. I am a little jealous of her Build-a-Bear collection and her report card!
  • Alex – (15) – currently a freshman in high school, is the avid gamer and computer expert in the family. Not sure what he wants to be when he grows up but I’m sure it’ll involve computers and/or gaming.

DSC_0044
Lola Clem and Diana

My father-in-law is gone now. But, his spirit lives on… through his children, his grandchildren and all those who knew and loved him….

Happy Birthday to my father and friend! You are greatly missed!

. . . .

although my heart may be weak
it’s not alone

it’s grown with each new experience
and it’s found a home with all the friends i’ve made

i’ve become a part of their heart…
just as they’ve become a part of mine

and if they think of me now and then
if they don’t forget me…

then our hearts will be as one
from Kingdom Hearts



About the author:
Has 3011 Articles

Carlos Rull is a musician living in the San Diego area. His interests include Yoga, Eastern Philosophy, Zen Buddhism, and Gardening. He plays drums, piano, and composes New Age & Ambient music, and his albums are available on iTunes and Amazon.com.

15 COMMENTS
  1. Carlyn R. Filio

    I also miss Mr. Roman, (known as Lolo Clem) to his grandchildren. There will always be so much to remember him by. We will never forget all the memories of his life.
    Also , it will be nine years on January 20th, when my beloved husband Joel M. FIlio passed on. I miss him every single day, MIchael and I have lost a great husband and father. We will miss all the loved ones who have gone before us. They will always be missed.

  2. Carlyn R. Filio

    I also miss Mr. Roman, (known as Lolo Clem) to his grandchildren. There will always be so much to remember him by. We will never forget all the memories of his life.
    Also , it will be nine years on January 20th, when my beloved husband Joel M. FIlio passed on. I miss him every single day, MIchael and I have lost a great husband and father. We will miss all the loved ones who have gone before us. They will always be missed.

  3. tokyorose

    i hope he knew how loved he was. you always speak about him with such affection. may he rest in peace.

  4. tokyorose

    i hope he knew how loved he was. you always speak about him with such affection. may he rest in peace.

  5. Pilar

    Thanks Carl, for the tribute to Dad it was very sad.

  6. Pilar

    Thanks Carl, for the tribute to Dad it was very sad.

  7. G

    Awww I wish my grandparents lived to be 80 at least so they could see how much we’ve grown up and how we’ve worked hard to be where we are now.

  8. G

    Awww I wish my grandparents lived to be 80 at least so they could see how much we’ve grown up and how we’ve worked hard to be where we are now.

  9. KC

    I understand how it feels to miss someone who has passed away. And this is a beautiful tribute. I agree with tokyo rose. I hope he knew of your great love and affection for him.
    Here’s to your friend and father -in-law. May he rest in peace.

  10. KC

    I understand how it feels to miss someone who has passed away. And this is a beautiful tribute. I agree with tokyo rose. I hope he knew of your great love and affection for him.
    Here’s to your friend and father -in-law. May he rest in peace.

  11. carlos

    thanks, everyone!

    it was around this time last year that my father-in-law was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer. sometime after his birthday, if i remember correctly. it just feels sad and at the same time surreal that this same time last year he was alive.

    when my father-in-law stayed at my home for weeks, and we took care of him (he felt uncomfortable with the hospice nurses) it was a time when i had gotten to spend a lot of time with him each day.

    during that time he told me i was his favorite son-in-law, and that meant a lot to me. of course, it just so happened that over the years i’ve known him, he spent a lot of time with me since he was always close by, and sometimes he would stay with us for awhile and spend time with his grandkids. and he helped me considerably over the years by gardening, babysitting and just being a great help to us.

    he told me many stories about his experiences during world war II, and of life in general. and he encouraged me to pursue and continue my musical career and thought it was a noble profession, when others discouraged me because they thought it was impractical. after all, life is short and you have to do what you truly enjoy and have a passion for.

    i think that in those last 6 months, he was very appreciative that his daughters and myself took care of him, and drove him to get his transfusions and to get check-ups, etc.

    thanks again, everyone, for your thoughts.

    and i encourage family and friends to add their thoughts and remembrances….

  12. carlos

    thanks, everyone!

    it was around this time last year that my father-in-law was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer. sometime after his birthday, if i remember correctly. it just feels sad and at the same time surreal that this same time last year he was alive.

    when my father-in-law stayed at my home for weeks, and we took care of him (he felt uncomfortable with the hospice nurses) it was a time when i had gotten to spend a lot of time with him each day.

    during that time he told me i was his favorite son-in-law, and that meant a lot to me. of course, it just so happened that over the years i’ve known him, he spent a lot of time with me since he was always close by, and sometimes he would stay with us for awhile and spend time with his grandkids. and he helped me considerably over the years by gardening, babysitting and just being a great help to us.

    he told me many stories about his experiences during world war II, and of life in general. and he encouraged me to pursue and continue my musical career and thought it was a noble profession, when others discouraged me because they thought it was impractical. after all, life is short and you have to do what you truly enjoy and have a passion for.

    i think that in those last 6 months, he was very appreciative that his daughters and myself took care of him, and drove him to get his transfusions and to get check-ups, etc.

    thanks again, everyone, for your thoughts.

    and i encourage family and friends to add their thoughts and remembrances….

  13. corey

    I thank you for sharing your story. I appreciate the bond that you have. I also had a father in law who meant the world to me. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and lost the very difficult battle almost a year ago. We were very close, and while he was fighting the cancer our bond strengthened. I miss him terribly every day! maybe they’re hanging together in the heavens. best wishes…

    1. Randomguru

      and thank you for your story… i sure hope so too (that they’re hanging out together in the heavens). 🙂

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